The Jesperson Family: We've Been Elfed!!

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Archive Tannerisms...

"Mom, what's for dinner?" We are having blueberry muffins and omelets. "Omelets? Do I like omelets?"

"Mom, come look at the puzzle I just did. You are going to think it's amazing!"

Tanner, please stop picking your nose. "Mom I can't, I pick my nose before I go to bed and wipe it on my bed so the booger monster can come and get it. He only eats boogers, not people, so I'm not afraid of the booger monster." Oh really, where do you put them. "I'll show you..." And sure enough, there were boogers wiped on his mattress. I have NO idea where this came from.

"Mom, have you heard the news, spring is almost here!"

I asked Tanner what we should name our new baby brother and he has said multiple times, "Cookie Joy."

I had to set the timer a few days ago for Tanner to come eat breakfast. When the timer went off, this was our conversation...

(Me): Tanner, the timer went off, please come eat breakfast.

(Tanner): "Ughhhh, I want to kill it."

(Me): Kill what?

(Tanner): I want to kill the timer!

**When I asked him where he had heard the word "kill" he reminded me that the day before I was running around the house saying I had to kill the spiders because I don't like them. This makes this conversation all the more funny to me!

(Tanner): "Mommy, can I go play outside."

(Me): Not today Tanner, it is so, so windy outside. you'll blow away!

(Tanner): "Mom, (in a really annoyed voice) I won't blow away, I'm not a balloon."

(Me): Tanner, if you don't eat your dinner, I'm going to take you home to bed.

(Tanner): "If you put me in bed, I'll jump up, run out the door, and just come back to Nana's."

(Me): Then I'll just have to lock the doors.

(Tanner): "You'll lock Nana's doors too?"

(Me): Yep.

(Tanner): "No, don't say those words."

(While changing his diaper) "Mom, is my poop white?" No Tanner, why would you think your poop was white? "Oh, because I was eating the snow."

(To a friend of mine who visited the nursery a few weeks ago) "Did you know I am the only 3 year old in here!" (Poor Tanner, turned 3 in Feb, will be in nursery until the end of the year).

"Mom, I'll say the prayer...In the Name of Jesus Christ, Amen." (He knows how to say a whole prayer, I think he just wanted to eat).

"Mom, we sure say a lot of prayers!"

(Kate crying...) "Kate stop being so sassy!" (Kate still crying...) "Kate, stop being sassy! I mean it! I'm serious!"

Last week the snow finally melted off our front lawn and I told Tanner I was so excited because spring was coming and it was going to get warmer and we'd be able to play outside. Saturday, it snowed really lightly, and Sunday morning, I hear Tanner in his room sadly exclaiming, "Oh no mommy, spring has already gone!"

"Mom, could we go to Old McDonald's?" You mean McDonald's? "Yes, McDonald's, and get some chicken nuggets?" Tanner, we have chicken nuggets here at home. "Whatever!" (I actually asked him to repeat himself, I could not believe that this was his response, I was laughing so hard).

(After jumping off the couch and hurting his ankle) "Mom, I need some goldfish." "You do?" "Yes, the goldfish will go into my tummy and go down to my ankle and make it feel better."

"Kate, you are frustrating me!

"Mom, when I wake up, will I be 3?" Yes Tanner, tomorrow is your birthday. "Am I going to turn 3 in my bed?" Yes, I guess you will.

Today, Matt asked Tanner if he turned 3 in his bed. His response, "Yeah I did, well wait, (pause), no I turned 3 in your bed." (Yes, Tanner still comes into our bed EVERY night, at least he thought that through)

Tanner do you feel older? "No mom, I'm still little, I'm just 3."

"Mom, you got these on ebay didn't you?"

"Mom, I Love You! You're my big red dog!" Thanks Tanner. (Watch Clifford?)

Looking at pictures from Cabo)..."Mommy, I'm naked!" Tanner, you aren't naked, you are just in your swimming suit with out a shirt. "No, look, you can see my two nipples, I'm naked!"

Tanner knows that when we cross the street, he has to hold my hand. One day I was holding Kate and carrying groceries, so my hands were full. I told Tanner to grab my purse and hold onto while we crossed the road. He said, "Oh that's okay mom, I'll hold my own hand!" And he did, he grabbed his hand and walked across the street!

Tanner stop picking your nose. "I can't mom." Why? "Because, my boogers are quite expensive, people want to buy them."Tanner's new favorite food is "Mommy's very yucky smoothie." (I make a protein shake some mornings and one morning Tanner asked if he could have some. I told him he didn't want any because it was mommy's very yucky smoothie. He still wanted to try it, so I gave him a sip...he LOVED it! Now he asks for "Mommy's very yucky smoothie" a few times times a day).

"Dang it, I don't want to eat my breakfast, I want to play with my toys."

Tanner, look at this cute costume with the tutu (we were looking at friends blogs). "Do they toot mommy?"

Tanner, you're a good boy, it's just time to go to bed. "Noooo, I'm a bad boy. I'm a very bad boy." A few minutes later..."I'm a very very sad boy."

To Uncle Cole on the phone..."No, I'm not going trick-or-treating, I wouldn't go to bed, and mommy said I would be in trouble if I didn't go to bed, so now I'm in trouble."

I was talking to a friend about Kate's labor and mentioned when my water broke. Tanner came over to me, and asked, "Mommy, were you sad? When your water broke, were you sad?"

Hey Tanner who are you talking to? (Holding a pretend phone up to his ear) "Oh mom, I'm talking to bulldozer." Oh yeah, what's he doing? "He's bulldozing."

(At Preschool)What shape is this flag? (Tanner)"It's a rectangle, just like the BYU flag, GO BYU!!"

"Hey mom, look over there, that cactus is broken. We need some tape so we can fix it."

While we were saying prayers, Tanner whispered, "Daddy, bless the Mickey Mouse Playhouse Concert." Arms were folded and he still had his eyes closed, he's pretty excited about the concert this week, lol!

"Kate, don't touch that, it's dangerous."Mom, I can't, I'm busy."

"Mommy, what's this?" It's a fly swatter. "Oh, what do you do with it?" You kill bugs. "I want to kill bugs." Ok, you can go outside and see if you can find any bugs to kill. (A few minutes later...)"Hey bugs, come here, I want to kill you."

Last week, Tanner started to call Matt's Dad "Papa John." Cute huh!

"Mommy, where are Grandma and Grandpa? Tanner, they went back to Texas. Noooo, Texas is too far away, can't they go to Arizona?"

"Grandma and Grandpa are you going back to Texas? Okay, Tanner go too, I'll get my shoes."

"Woah Mom, that was a big one. (Talking about the size of the poo-poos in his diaper-is this a sign I should be potty training?)."

"Kate, use your little boy voice, please"

"Okay Mommy, let's get to it." (This was Tanner's response when I told him what our plans were for the day).

"I smell poo-poos. Tanner did you go poo-poo. (Laughing) No, I just tooted."

"Mommy, I have a hungry-ache."

"Tanner are you tired? No, I am happy!"

"Mommy, can you draw me a bulldozer? Tanner, I don't know how. "Mommy, can you draw me a digger? Tanner, I don't know how to draw one of those either. Oh come on Mommy, will you please try."

"Mommy, my diaper is full."

"Mommy, be careful!" I was putting dishes away, and this was his response to hearing the dishes banging.

We were sitting in Sacrament meeting and Tanner looked up Matt's nose and audibly asked, "Daddy, where are you're big boogers?

"Tanner, what sound does the letter "R" make. (After a brief pause) "Arghhhh Matey." (We were going over ABC's and the way they sound and he was doing a really good job, so when I got to "R" and this was his response, it caught me completely off gaurd, I was laughing so hard)

Hey Nick, get off your computer and come over here and eat. One, two, three...(I wonder where he got that from?)

Tanner, would you like PB toast or Mighty Bites for Breakfast? "No Mom, I want to be sassy."

"Kate is cute. Mom and Dad are awesome. And Tanner is soooooo handsome!"

Archive Kate-isms

"I'm a pretty one."

(Matt) Are you?

"Yes, I'm a pretty little girl."

"I'm going to go get married in the temple mom."

(Mary) Who are you going to marry Kate?

"Tanner."

(Mary) I'm sorry honey, you can't marry your brother.

"Oh, well then I am going to marry these beautiful flowers."

(Mary) You can't marry the flowers either Kate.

"Why?"

(Mary) Well, flowers don't last forever, someday you'll find a boy that you can marry in the temple forever.

"Oh, okay."

Kate, would you like some lunch? "No, but thank you though."

"Mom these flowers are so beautiful, can I sleep with them in my bed tonight?"

I asked Kate what we should name our new baby brother and without hesitation she responded, "Sister."

(After getting Kate dressed in pink for the day) "Look at me, I'm pinkerella!"

(After Tanner threw a fit) "Mom, Tanner is frustrated."

"Mommy, Tanner is being a very bad boy."

(During the Sacrament) "Mom can I have a book?" Not until after the sacrament, during the sacrament, we think about Jesus. "Can I have a book about Jesus?"

"Mom, why are you giving the counter a blessing?" (She was watching me make bread, and I was shaping the loaves and this was her question to me when she saw me putting oil on the counter)

The Jesperson Family

Saturday, December 1, 2007

We've Been Elfed!!

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